The following is an excerpt from my novel in progress. Clearly I still have some work, particularly in developing some of the subtler plot points. My protag at this point is likeable, but I don’t know if he’s “fall-in-lovable” and I still struggle with whether I am being too literary when I ought to broaden the novel’s audience. Anyways, feedback welcome as always. Enjoy!
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23. Tuna salad on rye. Light Mayo. No capers.
71: “The Nothing but Condiments Club,” available at The Condiment Shop, with all your favorite condiments piled high between two pieces of egg white bread or, for the health conscious, whole oat.
89: “The Lieberman Lunch Sack,” to enjoy when in Connecticut. The key here is to significantly lower your expectations—then when it arrives, somehow, you’re still disappointed.
431: Roast Beef on a Kaiser roll with lettuce, tomato, mustard.
238: “The Hoaginator,” from Harry’s Heaping Hoagies on 32nd Street in certain cities. For best results order with the herring and fried egg on the side, easy on the yellow peppers and green onions, light ranch dressing. Double your salami to make it a true Hoaginator.
55. PB&J with or without crusts.
56: The other PB&J—that is, pickled tongue, bratwurst and jelly. Usually on sourdough and enjoyed in the Spring because of its obvious connections with fertility rights.
127. Classic Turkey Club. Substitute Soy Bacon for Bacon. Substitute Eggplant for Turkey. Substitute Veganaise for Mayonnaise. Enjoy with a heaping side of polish sausage.
2: Caffeine Free Diet Coke.
Tags: High Art, tongue in cheek